Every child is unique. However, all children follow basic patterns of growth and development, from infancy and early childhood through middle childhood and adolescence. Most parents want to know if their baby or toddler is developing ?normally?. The following is a basic guide as to what you might expect for the first four years of life. Each heading gives an idea about what a baby or child will usually do at that age. There will be individual differences, and the differences in the way you care for your child can sometimes have an effect on what your child does. A delay in these areas does not always indicate a medical problem.
To support healthy growth and development throughout childhood and in later years, proper nutrition, adequate rest and physical activity are essential.
However, among the most important things parents and other caring adults can do as children grow and develop is to provide them with plenty of attention and unconditional support at every stage of their development.
0 - 3 months
Relationships and feelings (often called social and emotional development):
? can feel, but not yet able to think ? will pick up your feelings
? watches parent?s face when being talked to by 4-8 weeks
? smiles by 5-7 weeks
? starts to laugh aloud by 3 months.
Out of step?
- No social smile by 8 weeks.
- Does not usually calm down, at least for a little while, when picked up.
Doing, seeing and hearing (often called motor skills, vision and hearing):
- when cheek is touched, turns to that side to suck from birth
- blinks at sudden noises such as hand claps or door slamming from birth
- may open eyes to normal speech sounds just as she is dozing off from birth
- startled by loud sounds by 1 month
- begins to notice sudden long sounds when they start and stop (eg vacuum cleaner) by 1 month
- lifts head when lying on tummy by 4-8 weeks (do not leave baby alone on tummy)
- kicks both legs strongly by 2 months
- arms, fingers and legs automatically move, bend, straighten and bend again
- follows a moving light with eyes by 1 month
- both eyes move together most of the time by 6 weeks
- watches a moving face by 2-3 months
- sucks well at the breast or from a bottle
Out of step?
- Baby is unusually stiff.
- An arm and leg on one side is obviously different in muscle tone or strength to the other side.
- Fingers are always held in a tight fist.
- Baby is not watching faces by 3 months.
- Baby is not startled by sudden noise.
- Seems unusually ?good? and not demanding compared to other babies.
Learning to talk (often called speech and language development):
- watches the face. makes other sounds besides crying by 2 months
- starts to make sounds and ?talk back? by 7-8 weeks
- appears to listen to parent?s voice and
Out of step?
- Not watching the person?s face when being spoken to by 3 months.
- Not making little sounds by 3 months.
Relationships and feelings:
- laughs aloud by 2-4 months
- enjoys being played with, laughs and kicks by 4 months
- makes eye contact with you and you will be smiling at each other.
Out of step?
- Doesn?t seem interested in things around him.
- Doesn?t seem to show delight in being with people.
- Doesn?t seem to recognize his parent or other familiar people.
Doing, seeing and hearing:
- enjoys watching others doing things
- makes eye contact
- likes looking at people and bright objects
- looks at hands and plays with own fingers by 3 months
- can grasp an object when placed in his hand by 3-4 months
- rolls over to his side around 5 months (range is 4-6 months)
- lifts head and chest when lying on his tummy by 4 months ? never leave baby alone on tummy
- begins to react to familiar situations by smiling, cooing and excited movements
- begins to turn head slowly to moderate level of sound (eg normal speaking voice) by 3 months
- should quieten or smile at sound of your voice, even if he cannot see you, by 4 months
- may turn his head or eyes towards you if you speak as you come from the side or from behind by 4 months.
Out of step?
- Does not open hands or straighten fingers.
- Arms and legs are bent most of the time.
- Is not kicking his legs.
- Does not follow activities with his eyes.
- Does not make eye contact with people.
- Does not turn to look for you when you speak.
- Is not looking to where there is a sound.
- Is not startled by loud noises.
- Unhappy or unsettled most of the time.
Learning to talk:
- makes lots of little voice sounds
- turns head towards a talking person by 5 months
- begins babbling then listening, around 3-4 months
- takes turn when ?talking? (making sounds) with parents.
Out of step?
6 - 9 months
Relationships and feelings:
- knows familiar people and is unsure of strangers
- at times might not go to people she knows well for a while ? but wants the main carer
- may become distressed when separated from the main carer
Out of step?
- Does not show pleasure when she sees people she knows well.
- Does not make eye contact.
- Cannot be comforted by parent or close carer.
Doing:
- rolls over on to tummy and back again by 7 months
- sits without support by 8 months
- starts to move around more and can roll and creep on her tummy by 8 months
- can move between positions, e.g. sitting to crawling to sitting by 8 months
- can hold a bottle to drink
- can start to drink from a cup which is held by an adult, by 8 months
- holds a spoon, but cannot use it, by 7 months
- shows interest in small objects and reaches out for them
- starts to look at and feel objects before taking them to her mouth
- looks in the right direction for things that have fallen down.
Out of step?
- Not starting to move around by any means.
- Not interested in and does not reach for objects by 8 months.
- Does not recognise parent or main carer.
- Does not show an interest in surroundings.
- Not interested in new objects.
Hearing and learning to talk:
- should turn immediately to very quiet sounds by 7 months
- babbles with sounds like "da da" and then starts to put these babbling sounds together by 6-7 months
- copies sounds made by other people.
Out of step?
- Babbling has not developed further and she does not babble in ?conversation? with others.
- Not turning towards you when calling her name.
9 - 12 months
Relationships and feelings:
- knows familiar people and starts to withdraw from strangers by 9 months
- begins to turn around when his name is called
- starts to become anxious if main carer is out of sight
- stretches up arms to be picked up
- may give clues as to whether hungry or needing a cuddle
- loves to be talked to and played with
- copies gestures such as coughing, waving
Out of step?
- Does not show pleasure when he sees people he knows well.
- Is not making eye contact.
- Cannot be comforted by parent or close carer.
Doing:
- points with the index finger
- drops and throws things on purpose
- passes objects easily from one hand to the other
- moves around by crawling by 10 months
- pulls up to standing by 11 months
- walks with hands held and feet wide apart and facing outward by 10-12 months.
Out of step?
- Is not sitting by 9 months.
- Holds his body stiff and cannot be put in a sitting position.
- Is not starting to move around in any way.
- Is not interested in new objects or reaching for them.
Hearing and learning to talk:
- looks for quiet sounds made out of sight by 9 months
- shows pleasure in babbling loudly by 9 months
- conversation ?babble? develops further
- knows the direction a sound comes from and turns to it immediately by 10-12 months
- shakes his head for "no" and nods his head to signal "yes", by 10-12 months
- knows and turns to his own name, by 12 months
- likes to look at picture books and can say some sounds at certain pictures
- there may be one or two single words.
Out of step?
- If he does not babble or make other sounds when someone talks to him.
1 - 2 years
This is a time of rapid change. Your baby is on the move full of energy and curiosity discovering the world. Parenting becomes demanding because you have to think about safety and setting limits as well as caring for your toddler. In this year your toddler is learning to be a separate person from you. The one-year-old sees everything and everyone being there for them alone. This self-centredness will continue through this year. This is a year of firsts ? first steps, first words, moving freely, running, climbing and exploring actively.
By 18 months:
- explores the environment around her, touching, pulling whatever she can see and reach
- shows different feelings and easily moves from happy to sad to angry
- is likely to be afraid of strangers
- shows a strong attachment to parents or main carer
- shows distress when left by a parent ? is often clingy when the parent returns.
Out of step?
- Does not show a preference for people she knows well.
- Does not seem to like cuddles.
By 2 years:
- plays near other children, but not yet with other children (unless the other children are older and able to adapt their play to fit the 2-year-old)
- unable to share or take turns
- gets upset by separating.
Out of step?
- Does not show awareness of different people.
- Doesn?t seem interested in surroundings or in people.
Doing
By 12 months can usually:
- pull self up on a lounge chair
- side step around the chair whilst holding on
- push a small trolley along in a straight line ? but can?t turn corners.
By 18 months can usually:
- walk, at first with feet wide apart, but as her balance improves so her feet get closer and straighter
- fall over if she tries to run
- climb onto low furniture
- push a wheeled toy such as a trolley
- place one object such as a block deliberately onto another
- start to scribble with a pencil
- pick up small objects.
Out of step?
- Not yet walking.
- Cannot hold a spoon and get food to her mouth.
- Cannot pick up small objects.
By 2 years a toddler can usually:
- start to explore more widely, opening doors and drawers and pushing buttons
- run fast without falling over when turning corners or stopping
- squat steadily to pick up objects from the floor
- bring a small chair to the table and sit on the chair at the table
- walk backwards pulling a toy or trolley
- get up without using her hands.
Out of step?
- Not walking steadily by 2 years, especially if there is a limp.
Learning to talk
By 18 months a toddler can usually:
- babble loudly to self and others, as though having a conversation
- listen to things said and understand some things such as "No" or "stop"
- follow a few simple instructions such as "Get your shoes"
- identify a few familiar objects when they are named such as "Show me the ball" or "Where is the spoon?"
- knows and uses 6 or more words (the words may be quite unclear, but the parent or carer can tell what is meant by the sound).
Out of step?
- Not babbling much.
- Not starting to use some meaningful words.
- Not listening when others speak to him.
By 2 years a toddler can usually:
- use 20 to 50 recognizable words
- listen to things that are said to him
- start to put 2 words together such as "Daddy?s car"
- join in with familiar songs e.g. nursery rhymes
- babble while playing, with a few recognizable words in the babble
- tells you most of what he wants with words, e.g. "outside", "milk", "want more" or "go away".
Out of step?
- Is still mostly silent while playing.
- Does not respond when others talk to him.
- Is not able to point to objects when they are named.
- Uses signs, grunts or gestures but not words when he wants something.
2 - 3 years
This is a time of challenge ? when toddlers really want to find out about themselves and what they want and don?t want. Their determination, tantrums and struggle for independence are all part of normal development. They have new skills and behaviors to learn and remember, feelings to grapple with, and these can be overwhelming. They can wait a little while ? but not for long. They can hold strong feelings inside a little, but these can burst out in a rush. Losing control of such feelings can be frightening ? they need lots of physical contact and reassurance that they are lovable.
Relationships and feelings
By 21/2 years can usually:
- try hard to be independent, say "No" a lot, or "Me do" (but still very dependent on parents)
- not be able to control his feelings ? tantrums are common especially when tired or frustrated
- not be able share with others or take turns
- start to play imaginative games, such as putting a doll to bed, driving a car around on the floor or ?feeding? toys.
Out of step?
- Is having tantrums very often.
- Does not play with adults or older children.
By 3 years, children can usually:
- try to copy adults, and may be able to be helpful eg help put toys away
- play games using lots of imagination and start to join in with other children?s play.
Out of step?
- Not playing imaginative games or using toys the way they are ?meant? to be used e.g. pushing a car along a road rather than just playing with the wheels.
- Mostly ?in his own world? rather than interacting with others.
Doing
By 21/2 years can usually:
- climb on and off furniture
- run smoothly and climb on play equipment
- kick a large ball gently but not necessarily where she wants it to go
- throw a ball more or less where she wants it to go
- climb up stairs
- feed herself with a spoon and drink from an open cup
- help to dress and undress
Out of step?
- Cannot run smoothly, especially if there is a limp.
- Cannot safely climb stairs or onto low furniture.
- Is far more active or less active than other children of the same age.
- Is not yet managing to feed herself most of the time.
By 3 years can usually:
- push or pull large toys around to where she wants them
- walk alone up and down stairs
- push the pedals on a pedal toy
- kick a ball forcefully
- throw a ball and catch one with outstretched arms
- undress and put on some simple clothes
- eat with spoon and fork
- manage toilet training (some children will not manage this until they are nearly 4).
Out of step?
- Not able to run as smoothly as other children of the same age.
- Not climbing skilfully.
Learning to talk
By 21/2 years can usually:
- understand a lot more than he can talk about
- use well over 100 recognisable words, but many of the words will be unclear, as he cannot say all of the sounds in the words
- put the words into short sentences eg "Look Mummy dog"
- talk during play
- let people know what he wants using words rather than signs
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